The Fat-Bottomed Girl's Guide To Travel

Part II: Bath

I’ve always loved seeing pictures and reading about the town of Bath; because it looks so Georgian and stately, but also because my favorite Jane Austen novel, Persuasion, is set there. I could imagine the dashing Captain Wentworth giving up his umbrella as I went to exit the candy store… I wish it were more than imagined, because the skies opened up and drenched us when we got to Bath, and neither of us had an umbrella. Just our “water-resistant” jackets. <eyeroll>

We had paid to go around the Roman Baths and it is a great exhibit – a lot about life in Bath hundreds of years ago, but also when the Romans built it – it had everything – a gymnasium, men’s and women’s pools, a changing room, massage areas, hot rooms, hot pools, cold plunge pools… amazing. The Georgians did tart it up a bit by adding Roman statues, but it has maintained a lot of its looks. You really have to watch your footing – the stones are not always level, and Sean nearly turned his ankle, and so did I. It was absolutely stunning to see the architecture and work that went into making it a spa, almost like we have them at some hotels, using a natural source.

Many buildings and storefronts hadn’t changed much, including the Bath Abbey, which sadly we didn’t have enough time to see. It is definitely a tourist town, making its living on visitors. There is another spa where you can “take the waters”, but again, not enough time for that.

With the rain pouring down, we shucked our coats and sat at a tea shoppe for a Lavazza coffee and a cookie. I actually had the Marshfield ice cream, from a local dairy just outside Lacock. Had the caramelised biscuit and it was the best thing I’ve ever had! We were tired, our feet hurt, and we didn’t want to venture out in the rain anymore, so we sat for the last 20 minutes until it was time to get on the bus.

I did have a conversation with an unhoused gentleman, in a shop alcove, both of us trying to get out of the weather. He was intelligent, kind, and had quite the sense of humor. I didn’t have any cash on me or I would have given him what I could to get him out of the rain for a couple of hours. I said goodbye and wished him well, and he did the same to me.

The bus smelled a bit like a wet dog as we all clambered aboard and took our seats. Our tour guide gave us even more facts and information about the area, and London. We passed by Windsor Castle, on the outskirts of the city. There is another tour with Viator you can take that does Stonehenge, Bath, and the castle. I thought that was a wee bit too much of an agenda for one day. I am glad we did the tour we did.

We got back to London just before 5, hopped on the Tube and came back to our neighborhood. The rain brings out the surliness and frayed edges of everybody. Some guy called me a “fat cow” as I tried to get out of his way on the escalator, but my, “fuck off, wanker” got a few giggles from those who had also felt his wrath. So sorry, your Majesty! Next time, let us know when you are planning to be in the Tube with the riff-raff and we’ll roll out the red carpet!

Went to a pub called the Eagle, close by our hotel, but there was a LOT of testosterone flying around, and the hard cider was awful so we had one and then left across the street to the Ivy Cafe, which was a lot more chic than it looked outside. We sat at the bar, which was great as we could see all the comings and goings. The kitchen and staff were not communicating well, and there were several mixups with orders with a lot of people, including ours. The bartender asked us what the problem was and we told him, politely. He poured us two glasses of wine and said he’d check on our food. Grateful for him looking after us.

Nevertheless, the food was exceptional, the staff was fantastic, and we had a good night. What was weird is that steak tartare in France and England is very different. Whether it’s because all the problems the UK has had with their beef in the past (BSE?), or because they’re not in the EU anymore, it is not raw, like in France. It’s cut up then seared for a few seconds, leaving it blue/rare. But there’s a difference. It was still delicious. I wondered in my head if I was courting fate by eating as much raw beef as I did on this trip. But it was addictive!

Headed back to the room, watched a bit of the snooker on TV, and was out like a light. Last day in London tomorrow.